COALING STATION, DRY TORTUGAS, July 14 (HNS) -- Today the former US coaling station in the tiny sea thread of Dry Tortugas has been captured by forces flying the flag of United Kingdom of Great Britain. The forces, consisting of several steam ships and sailing vessels, came from the thread known in some quarters as "Mad Science London."
"The battle was brief," said Private Henry Bronner, a long-time resident of the Thread. "We'd be expecting an attack from Apophis for a long time. They fired some artillery to soften us up, and then used some sort of device to request our surrender in the name of their King... It was loud."
"We were so relieved they weren't monsters," said Private Ethan Kepner, another resident of Dry Tortugas. "We surrendered almost immediately. There was some grumblings when half the steamships offloaded metal men, and there was a brief riot when the green-skinned folk got off that one ship, but the metal men put a quick stop to that with their rifles."
By the time the press got on the scene, there was no evidence of "green-skinned folk", though brass, clockwork soldiers were in evidence.





